You guys, this place is dead

Are blogs still a thing?

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Happy New Year!

I finally came back after forgetting my login and my password for a long time (Hi, Alex! I still owe you an e-mail. . . )

I actually haven’t e-mailed anyone about anything for a long time. I’m being crushed by administrative crap at my job. I’ve been getting home from work late and then I don’t feel like doing anything. . . except that I have to do more administrative crap. It’s utterly soul-sucking, especially because I’m realizing just how lazy and task-avoidant other people can be, if they think I’m going to get stuck doing something for them (which I am, apparently), and because I stay up late writing e-mail instead of doing other things (like, sleeping, or reading books), and because I don’t really socialize at all. It would be nice if I could crawl out from under all of it soon; it would be even better if I didn’t really care and could let myself do a half-assed job, but I can’t.

Aside from that, nothing has really happened since I last posted here, probably. I saw Alex in New York back in 2014 (!), then I went to England for a little while, and when I came back I developed a meningitis-like virus (none of, like, six doctors had any idea what it was) and lost most of my vision for a month. That was pretty scary. I had such extreme double vision that I couldn’t focus on anything that was farther than about ten inches from my face. I wound up in an emergency room, had a shitload of blood drawn, had a couple MRIs, and lots of un-fun drugs. There was lots of shrugging and people telling me, “Sometimes these things just happen.” The initial speculation was either that I had had a small stroke or that I had a tumor. So I spent a lot of time sitting still and wondering whether it was in fact the end of the line, literally. I had a lot of those long, weird interior conversations about whether I had actually done anything meaningful with my life (no), whether there were things I still really needed/wanted to do (yes), and what tunes I’d want to have played at my funeral (umm. . . “Moon over Marin” by the Dead Kennedys? “Clash City Rockers” and “Mystery Achievement”?). It made me feel like chucking my job, although I don’t know what I’d actually do.

But then. . . I was fine. Life goes on. My dad is not well, and I’m dealing with that. I feel like I’m kind of whining about nothing, since white-collar job issues are a first-world problem and there is (apparently) still time for me to do something about that. I miss you guys. I miss punk and playing my guitar and not having to dress like a quasi-corporate stooge. I hope you are all well. Write stuff here! And I’m glad I came back and found some of you and saw those little snow-flake thingies on the site.

I have the sneaking suspicion that there is a Stevic Sin involved in all of this, but I don’t remember what it is. Happy New Year, dudes.

Posted in E-Love, Holidays, Rants and Raves, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments

I Miss You Jerks

I spent 45 minutes remembering how to log in and post.

I saw Jen D. (yeah, S. — whatever — some things are fixed in time)  post in the Shabby thread recently. That makes me super happy, in a totally slightly less depressed than I was an hour ago kind of way. (RIP Shabby and Von Kobra).

I wrote a whole thing about how bleak and awful life is, but I took pity on you bastards and deleted it.

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“Tell the Rabble My Name Is Cabell”

Steve McKenzie, at this time I would like to thank you for unwittingly introducing me to the work of James Branch Cabell via a post you made re: Jurgen on the forums so many years ago.

Recently finished Figures of Earth.  Great stuff. Eventually I will get around to reading the entire Manuelian cycle.

Any other reading recommendations?

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Stevie Wonder – Superstition Live on Sesame Street 1973

This is worth watching right to the end…great instrumental stuff and the kids’ crazy dancing.

PS – Hi all. I moved back from the Pacific ages ago. I quit my increasingly shit job at Uni last year and I am back studying conservation and land management so I can get a non-desk job. I know several people who do this work, repairing land reserves and the riparian zones of rivers and so on, they all say it’s great although the money sucks, but I’m going to give it a shot anyway.

Hope you guys are all doing OK. Steve.

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Please help with Jarrod Shanahan’s expensive legal defense! (a long-winded annoying request for donations…)


Please donate to help pay for Jarrod Shanahan’s legal defense.

Somebody once said if there were more bloody noses there’d be fewer wars. Well, the Manhattan DA, the NYPD, and their pals in media and politics aren’t so keen on cops receiving bloody noses in the name of ending the police state’s racist class war on the poor. They sure like to dish it, but they’d prefer to bankrupt you, steal years of your life or murder you before they’d even consider taking the tiniest dose of their own medicine… It’s important to support members of the community who are accused of defending themselves and their comrades from police violence. With all the self-interested back biting, social climbing and provocation by infiltrators that goes on in the activist community, sometimes the only way to know a comrade truly has the courage of his/her convictions is if they are willing to put their life on the line to defend themselves and their friends from the homicidal forces of state oppression…

Here’s the deal: I hope round up a few more bucks to donate toward Jarrod’s legal fees. He’s already been extorted for $25,000 bail (despite having no criminal record, which is pretty much unheard of) and because of the nature of the case he will certainly accrue a shit-ton more lawyer fees. There is no “official” fund set up yet. I’m doing this personally because I want to help, but can’t. One of Jarrod’s good friends has suggesting donating money to TMOCNYC. I’ll give it a few days before trying to contact Jarrod or his family/representatives to figure out if that is where he wants the money to go or if there will be a fund established specifically for his legal fees. I’ll direct the money wherever Jarrod and his family want it to go.

So, maybe some of you have auto-notifications of new posts on this blog. I hope so. Some of you I know on facebook and others of you may have gotten an email from me already cyber-panhandling. I’m trying to scrounge up a couple more  bucks for Jarrod Shanahan’s legal fees. Sorry to be repetitive. I spammed all 400 contacts in my gmail and got one anonymous donation of $20, which is unfortunately a lot more than I can donate myself. I’m dead fucking broke. This is all I can do. Beg. Please reblog or share this request if you can. Every little bit helps.

A good friend of a friend is in serious trouble. He is about to be railroaded and is already being defamed and villainized online and in the press. His case will surely be used by the DA, NYPD and the mayor to score political points for being tough on anti-racist, anti-authoritarian sentiment. This guy’s life is at stake and any one of us could have been in his shoes-– or we may yet find ourselves in his situation. So help out if you can. At lest help try to spread the word that Jarrod is innocent and that he is being falsely accused.


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R.I.P. Shabbytiger

I heard today through Little Benny Catastronaut that Jason, a/k/a Shabbytiger on the Punk Planet forums, has died.

I don’t know any details, and I’m guessing Ben found out through Facebook, which I am not on, so those who have kept up with former posters may know more.

Too many people who were on gone too young….

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